I’ve been thinking a lot about the things that I wish I knew in high school lately. I’ve come up with a ton of ideas that I will be sharing with you guys in the coming weeks, but the most prominent thought that came into my head was that of girls and dating.
Dating was the biggest deal in my mind during my high school years. Everything revolved around that mysterious opposite sex, and how I could woo them into loving me forever.
Here are a few of the lessons that I so dearly wish I knew heading into that hormonally charged mess.
#1 – Girls are not a big deal.
Not to bum you out, but statistically most high school relationships will end by the time you go to college.
This is great though! It takes off the pressure of having to commit to a serious serious relationship, and allows you to focus on simply enjoying it while it lasts.
#2 – Girlfriends ARE a big deal.
As someone who has been both the invisible dork that reads all day in school, and a semi popular guy who is involved in extracurriculars and has many friends; High school is a hell of a lot easier if you’re popular.
Having a popular girlfriend is a very easy way to boost yourself up the High school totem pole.
And so how do we get those popular girlfriends?
Girls do not want what they say they want. Never ask a fish advice for fishing.
Girls do not want kind, caring, or emotional. That’s what guy friends are for and that’s why you have been friendzoned.
Girls want excitement, fun, and an emotional rock to keep them steady.
How to be exciting?
- Be doing things.
You should be in as many extracurricular activities and clubs as you can possibly shove down your throat. Be sure to try to balance yourself out however.
A sport is a must, it develops your body so that you can attract these hot girls, and it develops your work ethic and stoicism so that you can learn to value yourself.
After you lock down a sport you enjoy, choose a couple humanities based clubs. I was very engaged in my Classical league (latin club), but some other great options are learning to play an instrument, learning to develop good arguments in Youth and Government, learning to fight or dance, etc…
The main focus of these extracurriculars is to be developing you as a human BECAUSE YOU WANT TO FOR YOU.
If you focus on becoming the most interesting and well-rounded you that you can be, and the girls come naturally as an extension of that focus.
- If you already have things planned, going on dates becomes the simple matter of inviting girls to things you are already doing.
If you invite a girl to a club, hike, activity, meet that you are already a part of; you gain the confidence of having the home field advantage.
You become the guide.
- Be a leader amongst your peers.
There’s this effect found in crowds in which nobody in a crowd steps forward unless someone else does. (Bullying)
In order to be a leader, all you need to do is step up to the position. People naturally fall in behind those who take the lead.
- If you do plan a one on one date, plan something in which you are moving.
Netflix and Chill is the worst idea you could possibly ever have. It’s designed as a plausibly deniable end to your date. A reason to go home. NOT the date itself.
- Get her endorphins flowing.
Do something risky or competitive.
You can go to Wallmart and put googly eyes on everything you find in the store. The more inanimate, the better.
Have a random dance party in the parking lot when you leave. Just open up you car doors and blast some music. Be sure to invite all of the passerby’s. It’s not a party until there are at least three people dancing.
Go play tag. The competition and the adrenaline allow her to associate you with excitement.
Follow people and imagine what’s going through their minds. Make it so unrealistic that it’s hilarious.
Go on an exploratory adventure on a local hiking trail. Make up a story to go along with the adventure. Talk about how archaeologists have recently discovered news of an ancient idol; said to imbue it’s holder with the ability to see five minutes into the future. Potentially changing the course of the future of humanity. As you tell her about the artifact, be sure to avoid falling into the deep, lava filled ravines (roots); and be sure to crawl under the ancient Aztec poison dart traps.
Let your imagination run with this one. If you are able to give somebody the gift of reactivating their long lost imagination, you will become invaluable in their life.
- Be Sprezzatura
Sprezzatura can be simply defined as practiced grace. It is allowing people to place you on a pedestal because they need that hero figure. It is simply not demystifying yourself.
Appear relaxed and easygoing, at least when you’re around the girl. If you’re stressed or angry, talk to your guy friends about it. Girls want absolutely none of that malarkey.
That’s it guys. Now, go take this knowledge and have a fun time with it.
Combine my thoughts in new and interesting ways, and then go to our youtube page and comment your results. I want to hear about your story. Did you succeed? Did you bomb horribly and make a fool of yourself? … If so, don’t worry. So did I. Many times. We will be here to help you remember rule #1, and to help you grow beyond it.